Sunday, January 31, 2010
I've had a strong admiration for Kathryn Bigelow for many, many years now. Point Break is pure 80's action goodness, and Near Dark is pre-Twilight era vampire badassery, back when vampires caught fire in the sun and would rather eat teenage girls than date them.
I'm thrilled that Ms. Bigelow has finally achieved a real level of mainstream and critical success, and the fact that she has done so with a movie that kicks as much ass as The Hurt Locker makes it even better.
This movie grabs you by your throat and choke slams you to the ground, then rubs your face against the concrete for 130 minutes of non-stop awesome.
This is the first Iraq War movie that isn't pushing a political agenda, it's only goal is to put you in the middle of things, and shake you up for a couple of hours.
Jeremy Renner is such a badass that he would rather blow stuff up than bang Kate Austen from Lost. WOW.
Alternate titles I came up with while watching Peter Jackson's new film:
The Boring Bones
The Slovenly Bones
Remember the last 15 minutes of the Return of the King, the way you shifted in your seat uncomfortably just waiting for the movie to be over? Well that's pretty much how I felt for the entirety of this jumble of a film. Nothing worked for me.
I'm sorry Mr. Jackson, but you fail.
One point each for Stanley Tucci's awesomely creepy performance and his equally awesome mustache.